"Angels first place, A's second place, Rangers third place, Mariners last place," Selig said. "Sound familiar yet? If not, get used to it, as that will be your AL West for the next 20 or so years."

So why bother even hiring a manager?

* * *

Orel Hershiser? In green and gold? Are you kidding me? That's just way too weird to actually happen.

Not that he wouldn't make a good manager, but...it's just unthinkable.

Then again, Hershiser did wear a Giants uniform once. That's probably even more unfathomable.

But really, Billy Beane is just screening Paul DePodesta's calls, right? Right?

* * *

Or maybe, the Dodgers and A's got their brains caught in a lunar-powered thought transferrence device, and they are gradually becoming the other. Next thing you know, The Dodgers will start wearing white shoes, and Tommy Lasorda will start telling everyone he bleeds green.

* * *

If Nova Science NOW were there, they'd take the women out of the water, and perform surgery on them.