The beach is within view of my hotel room. I turn my head 45 degrees and I can see a lovely swimming pool. The temperatures in the 80s, but the trade winds are keeping things from getting too oppressive.

So naturally, the first thing I do after checking in is make sure the Internet connection is working. It wasn't -- turned out the setup is not wireless as implied by some of the hotel's promotional material and that I would need an Ethernet cable. So I trudged down to the front desk to ask for one from a clerk who gave me a look like, "Wait a minute... you are here on our beautiful garden isle that looks like it was assembled by some Hollywood set decorator. Stroll for two minutes and you could be wading in the Pacific. And you want to log onto the Internet?"

Yes, I do. "I have to check on a baseball score," I explained to the clerk, as if that would suddenly add clarity to my request. I am the first one to admit this may be a sickness.

So I got my cable, logged on, and wouldn't you know it, someone at Yahoo screwed up and posted the score of a Raiders-Chiefs game. Near as I can tell, a field goal from Sebastian Janikowski helped put the game out of reach. Well done, fellow Pole.

The A's game was over by the time I landed in Lihue, so I didn't get the opportunity to scan the AM dial looking for a signal from the mighty A's radio network. I did, however, flip on the TV and my hotel room to discover we get Fox Sports West. They were showing a replay of the Angels' thrashing of the Indians, and Rex Hudler was enthusing about the hustle and grit and sticktoitiveness of some Anaheim player or another.

Wait, wait, wait -- my only exposure to baseball here is going to involve Rex Hudler? I thought this place was supposed to be paradise.